Birthday Wish for YOU

Guess what? Its your birthday today. The day you turn fifteen.

I have no idea why I'm posting this. Its totally pointless. As if you will read this. Why would you?

*Ugh* I sound so pathetic and bitter.

Well, I remember. Do you remember?

My birthday, when I just turned 14. When I went to your school for that dinner. When we had our countless chats online. When I stalk you online.

Do you know how I felt?

I felt like a girl. Young. Helpless. Swept off my feet. My heart beat fast every time I stand next to you. When we accidentally come in contact, my heart nearly files out of my mouth. Every time my phone vibrates, I smile, knowing that its you. How I stare at your facebook and messenger status, willing you to be online.

We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it. 

Yes, we lost it. Was it because of me? Was it because of you? I don't think it was me.

It's nice to know that you were there, Thanks for acting like you cared, Making me feel like I was the only one.

It's nice to know we had it all, Thanks for watching as I fall, Letting me know we were done. 

Its your birthday. Its your birthday. Its your birthday. 

I shouldn't go all EMO on you. Even though. You don't really deserve my kindness. 

GOD! Why am I doing this? 

You were everything, everything, that I wanted. 

I don't like you anymore. But. But. But. But. But. 

How come I still can't talk to you? Normally? Like friends? Why is is so awkward? Why does it feel so weird? Its so suffocating. 

Cause You broke all your promises. 

I wanna forget you. I wanna hate her. I wanna hate you. I wanna forget her. 

But I can't. 

I'm sorry for posting this. But if I don't do this. I have no other way of telling you. My blog is my only way of shouting out my feelings. 

*sigh*

What can I do? Happy Birthday, you. 

This song is for me, not for you. I have nothing to give you. So sorry. 

Disappointed Angel